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 = Confession Gone Mad =

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Madeye
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PostSubject: = Confession Gone Mad =   Fri 07 Nov 2008, 12:24 am

check it out...

*this was typed out in about 15-20 minutes prior to posting, and I was blazed*
Don't wanna defy my own meanings but at times I deviate
Lost in a world of chaos that brings me on knees ~ off'uh Faith
Can I Make somethin'?... Of This entrapment that holds me?
Or am I just As tha' Next Guy? Born to Live Alone, Lonely...
Inside still cold, grown colder to the point I'm Glacier Cored
Impatient for... The day my Body's Buried in'uh basement floor
My mind Done Waged A War from the first Independant Thought...
Thought I was Slippen off Rhythem There... but-No Man, I'm Really Not*
...

Imcompleteness in needless Rages that Buckle ya' Parents
Ineluctable, Un-Fuck-Wit'-Able Concotion... Apparent-
Errant appearance dozing for clearance... Who be next to clash?
smash ya' solar plexus, arms' a necklace - these texts is rash!
Show compassion to shit you wrote... Won't Ask if ya' Solid...
I'm seein' through ya' writtens, bitch... My devotions' On Knowledge...
...
Fuck pre-school, Elementary... High-School ~and don' forget college
Smoked the t.h.c. 'fore these a.b.c.'s! I'm A Scholar!
Gimme' ya' threats, I'll give ya' Debts, dents... Reh'pent! ~don't Hide It...
Come for a beefy luncheon and I'll feed you somethin' ya' mind don't pilot!
...
When I roll, it's violent... Dog-pile on ya' Flimsy Views
first ya' talk fire and then ya' rhymes be shitt'n-ya'-Crew...
First six words - ya' through, diluted as piss-in-toilets
Prolly not what you had envisioned 'fore Mad' toyed wit' ya' buoyance!
....


yea-yeah.... wuss' godd, Famz!??

one ['1]

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DiReCt HiT
Fresh Meat
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PostSubject: Re: = Confession Gone Mad =   Sat 08 Nov 2008, 2:33 am

Youve improved.

your starting to get more complex with your rhyme scheme, and vocab is getting up.
topic wasent hit to a pulp but i liked the lyrics and the storytelling very solid.



Errant appearance dozing for clearance... Who be next to clash?
smash ya' solar plexus, arms' a necklace - these texts is rash!

^^ i was digging that.


keep scribblen rtf
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east renegade
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PostSubject: Re: = Confession Gone Mad =   Sat 08 Nov 2008, 4:13 am

hot verse, real nice use of vocab and complexity but i agree wit direct, u went off the topic a lil but it was still gd, the lyrics was mad nice and overall it was a solid piece and flowed well
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mickey
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PostSubject: Re: = Confession Gone Mad =   Sat 08 Nov 2008, 5:19 am

good shizz
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Kris Kokain
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PostSubject: Re: = Confession Gone Mad =   Sun 09 Nov 2008, 7:45 am

i liked this.. props.. looks like M.E. is gon' be competition in the tourny.. look out ya'll..
...rhyme scheme was good.. only thing i didnt like was the first 2lines of the second verse i guess.. jus wasnt workin for me.. but other then that i was feelin it.. props..
... i think we should collab. sum time Very Happy
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