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 Twisted..

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Kris Kokain
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PostSubject: Twisted..   Fri 05 Dec 2008, 7:08 am

im plannin on turnin this into an audio..
..duno bout the chorus, will hav to tweak it n ish.. along wit the verse..
i wrote this ish in lik 20mins, chorus n all.. so lemmy know..

lets get twisted..
lemmy know ya down fo that..
got the henny an with it..
we got that pound'a grass..
lets get twisted..
call up sum hunnies tonite..
get ballistic..
an tare this mawfucka down wen we fight..
lets get twisted..


see me wen i drop n fade, SOO TWISTED- my pen pop off the page, cranium gon' soft for days, the cid done rocked my state, some1 get'a doctor str8, n operate.. cuz my eyes spinnin n square jiggin, while my grillz grinnin n scares women, thinkin imma start hittin n tare in'um, till they see stars lik planitariums, now my beats erratic- man its scary son, soon the nitestalker phanthom carry'um, n barry'um- in shallow graves, wit easy exits- i'll prowl for days, still high off the shit i ate down today, along wit'a sniffed pound of YA, just'ta numb the sorrow, cuz i'm still down to get twisted tomorrow..//


cyclops
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Tha Kid
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PostSubject: Re: Twisted..   Sat 06 Dec 2008, 9:33 pm

Tha chorus was iight but definetly needs justa lil tweaking but u already know that lol

I like tha rhymes n multies on this piece but that flow was kinda messed IMO some parts sounded like they were meant to be read slow n some parts real fast, idk if thats tha way tha beat ur writing to [if you are] is or if your just doing that but than again i could be reading it wrong lmao...anyways nice job...but stay off tha yay lol
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Kris Kokain
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Number of posts : 394
Age : 28
Location : Kingston, ON., Canada
Mood : Carnivorous
Points : 0
Registration date : 2008-11-04

Battle Record
Wins: 3
KO Wins: 2
Losses: 1

PostSubject: Re: Twisted..   Sat 06 Dec 2008, 10:11 pm

rofl.. i dnt do YAY.. but i hav tried.. lol.. jus thot it sounded funy, an yah.. its a go fast go slow kinda read haha.. i didnt write to a beat.. kinda jus wrote it out.. thanx fo the feed,...
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Tha Kid
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Number of posts : 264
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PostSubject: Re: Twisted..   Sat 06 Dec 2008, 10:14 pm

oh iight....now im not audio so i can be completely wrong on this but i think its best to find a beat first and write to tha beat cuz -im guessing- it would be hard to find a beat that exactly fits with your chorus and verses ya know?
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Kris Kokain
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Number of posts : 394
Age : 28
Location : Kingston, ON., Canada
Mood : Carnivorous
Points : 0
Registration date : 2008-11-04

Battle Record
Wins: 3
KO Wins: 2
Losses: 1

PostSubject: Re: Twisted..   Sun 07 Dec 2008, 4:21 am

rofl, i know that haha.. i jus felt like writing sum ish.. beat wasnt a big deal for me.. i was jus writin, but wen i do look for a beat.. duno wen i will start, but i'll probly end up re-writing my ish... this is jus a rough draft, kinda lik a template of wut i wana say..
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