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 Human Dictionary

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Philisophical@Rappn
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Number of posts : 45
Age : 28
Location : detroit
Mood : feel like rappen a story
Points : 3
Registration date : 2008-11-16

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PostSubject: Human Dictionary   Fri 12 Dec 2008, 10:26 am

Praised for raps, that hold attention to ya soul
Controlling these rappers , Biofedback flow
Devous, at ryhmes im underhanded at best
Incarseratted,for maken rappas put on lyrical vest
Lessening ya pain, new nick name Alleviate
Been refered to as a bigot, cause fake rappers i hate
Chastize rappers, for there lack of vocabulary
Kill pilfer's, cause stealing lines are un carring
You can tell by my flow by now im very agitated
Disturbed is betta 4 those that are uneducated
Mad cause im finally given sumthin 2 make u think
My brain hold words, that will make the average brain shrink
Different hues of colors are swimming through my head
Hues, are shades, now he is lyrically brain dead
With contemplation, im thinking thoroughly you see
As i write this ryhme no one will understand it but me
And if you dont understand some of the words i display
Pick up a dictionary, look it up, then u'll say ''Oh Okay''
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Madeye
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Number of posts : 496
Age : 41
Location : Here and now.
Mood : Predatorial
Points : 1
Registration date : 2008-10-24

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Wins: 4
KO Wins: 2
Losses: 1

PostSubject: Re: Human Dictionary   Fri 12 Dec 2008, 9:57 pm

...nice flow, and I'd say it was your main showcase here.

opener was good, bringing me in, as the reader.
that BioFeddback shit was nice... good creativity and originality there.
last line of yur second bar could'uh been formulated better... if you'd
takin' a little more time working that out, it would have been locked
in your swag more. Wasn't feelin' that lyrical vest bit.

Vocab was nice, yo. Content was aiight for the most part... but you had
a couple spots I wasn't feelin' as much as the rest of this.
Second "filler" segment (imo) was the
lyrically brain dead concept...
it didn't fit into the Hues/Shades concepts which were leading
the line... so you basically overlooked your start there, at that point.

That average brain shrink ish was aiight, too... but, again - if you'd taken another minute to think that through, it would have had more weight to it.
...another thing... you're not quite locking in Full Multies... In case you
didn't know this... and it's no bad thing... I have a similar style. But it's
beneficial to flow, also, if you add in some "inner" multies to balance the
half-multied parts.

...but hey, this drop was in some degree good topical fire, Fam.
Closewre was aiight... nothing to be "victory" dancing over... but shows
a little brainstorming, at least.

Quote :
As i write this ryhme no one will understand it but me
I really enjoyed reading that line... and not because it's got anything
special to it... but I've thought up this exact same line a while ago (conceptually)

Props on stittin' this out with "real" intentions, though, Fam. Really. I meant that.

Def~ got some nice potential in topicals and perhaps story-type shit.
This isn't necessarily showing Str8 Text Battle qualities, but you certainly
have a way with conveyances... so, think about that for a sec. Wink

Keep this up, Philos'... good lift.

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Philisophical@Rappn
Fresh Meat
Fresh Meat
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Number of posts : 45
Age : 28
Location : detroit
Mood : feel like rappen a story
Points : 3
Registration date : 2008-11-16

Battle Record
Wins: 0
KO Wins: 0
Losses: 0

PostSubject: Re: Human Dictionary   Thu 18 Dec 2008, 9:51 am

Thanx for the positive feed man i really do appreciate it
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